Archive for Sarkozy

America. Despite my rants, it IS in fact superior. Part 1 – The Arrival

Posted in Hate with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on June 8, 2009 by circuitspec

Well my faithful haters, I’ve decided to go ahead and grace your ever-so-hungry eyeballs with more of my absolutely amazing words. In one of my previous blogs, you may recall my rantings on how absolutely ignorant, and quite frankly, stupid many Americans can be. Let it be known, despite our social…and ever growing physical short comings we still are the greatest nation on this God forsaken planet.

Before I even bother to equip my flame suit, many would ask…what prompted this sudden declaration of patriotism? Simply put, I’ve been able to do, what only so many Americans dream of. I’ve recently returned from abroad. I’ve met many different people. Some very open to dialogue, others who frankly don’t give a shit, drunk Finnish people, Scots, Brits, Italians…but no other people on this planet thus far cease to not only piss me off, but further solidify my burning hatred then whom?…

….The French.

You know, it’s a damn shame that these people have been blessed the amazing real estate they call home. Never in my existence, have I locked horns with more self-righteous, rude and pompous people. So, as an American, just WTF was I doing there? Well, here it goes…

A fellow hater, and comrade in arms Mitch McKee of VE Engineering and myself set out from the United States to this ever-hostile territory for a few reasons. Mitch, being the world renowned ECU Tuner he is, set out to tune our French Connection’s APS Twin Turbo’d 350Z. His payment would be a free trip to France and tickets to the Monaco Grand Prix Formula 1 Race. Not familiar? It’s a big fucking deal. More to come on that later…My reason? I had a rotting credit with American Airlines that I refused to let expire this year…and frankly, I needed to fucking see this world. So off we went.

Destination – The French Riviera.

5-20-09, I spend two hours straight conversing with a drop-dead gorgeous British girl named Charlotte. I always had this thing for their accent, this British Airways flight from London assured that. She rocked, loved hip-hop and had a pretty good sense of humor. Her teeth were all in the right place too. Too bad I didn’t get an opportunity for that number. She was headed to Monaco. We ended up getting separated in customs anyway.

I now land in Nice, France’s Cote D’Azur Airport after layovers in Dallas and London. It’s at this point I immediately notice the smell of burning that France seems to have in the air. It’s terrible. Anywho, Cote D’Azur is a teeny, tiny airport that shoots out international flights, and domestics within France. It’s pretty unique. It reminds me of Burbank’s Bob Hope Airport, but with mini-baller shops, customs and international flights.

I’m fortunate enough to quickly grab my luggage. I call The French Connection (his real name is Charles) he’s on his way at this point. I kick it for about 45 mins or so. Not half bad.The time is about 6pm in Nice, the weather is very similar to California’s at this time of year – fucking perfect. He proceeds to rush in, get me and tell me about our rental…

It’s a 2009 Audi A3 Cabriolet 2.0TDI. We don’t get these in the U.S. Normally, I would say this is a car I wouldn’t be caught dead in, especially with another dude. Unfortunately, I had no choice at this point. Couldn’t we have gotten a gay ass euro-hatch? Whatcha know about two dudes, one little droptop. We looked about as straight as a circle together. Off we go storming down Le Promenade Des Anglais. It’s a gorgeous strip of asphalt that sits along the Mediterranean. Here you’ll see people jogging, sun bathing, walking…doing whatever.

 

From there, we basically proceed to go straight to drinking. The French Connection likes to frequent this place called Le Sun7 Cafe in Cannes. Quick French lesson for you folks, 7 is pronounced “set”…put the two together, The Sunset Cafe, kind of clever. Needless to say, I quickly find out why this guy frequents this joint. It’s a intimate little bar, with an extremely youthful vibe that stays up for MANY hours. It’s here I quickly learned about European’s love for being out fucking late. You can see in the link HERE how this place looks from the outside.

Needless to say this place gets rowdy. Decently priced drinks, if you even want to call it that coming from the US, good music…not a bad start to a trip. There’s alot that happened that night concerning this place, but I’ll touch on that, on another day. Bear in mind, this whole time The French Connection will NOT allow me to get Euros. I’m still stuck with US Dollars. He’s forced to foot the bill. We get thoroughly blitzed, and end up having to pull an all nighter, due to the fact that Mitch is arriving at 8:30 or so the following day. Definitely a start to a trip.

….definitely more to come in the next session folks!

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