Archive for shoes

There is a higher power…Crocs to go out of business!

Posted in Hate with tags , , , , , , , , on July 27, 2009 by circuitspec

Crocs – the shoe for the kind of person who thinks books are too wordy, or thinks that putting something on your feet that doesn’t make you look like an asylum inmate is for other people – has recently posted that their financial future may not be looking so bright. Which is great. Because now people can go back to wearing proper shoes. And don’t give me that crap about “non skid” or “comfortable” or even “feet could breathe”. You’re not 4. You’re allowed to have laces and buckles and things that are confusing to other species on your feet. You’re allowed to buy grown-up person shoes. I don’t care if they’re comfortable. They make you look like a low-functioning elf.

From the report: The company said it is in discussion to replace its current revolving credit facility, which matures on April 2, but if it cannot secure additional financing and continues to lose money, “we may be unable to maintain a level of liquidity necessary to continue operating our business,”

Not even Mario Batali – who refuses to take off his orange Crocs – can really get away with wearing them. Not even Jared Leto – who has been sporting a pair of silver(!) Crocs – can get away with wearing them. Crocs are the bane of human existence and should be outlawed already if they were not about to go out of business. One day, people will look back and say “wow. those things suuuure looked terrible”. Much like the powdered wig, the fake mole, and the fact that no-one bathed in the 1700’s, future generations will look back and say “Those rubber shoes with the holes in them were for upper middle class people? What the f**k? Was that really necessary?”. It’s not like people who needed them could really get them, either. Not like you saw hobos wandering the streets in the affordable rubber shoes. Because a) they had friggin holes in them and b) I’d rather wear a boot with a floppy sole, too, if I was given the choice. Crocs are the single worst thing to come out of fashion in the 2000’s. We are not all Danish people from the future. We are not all Lilliput people, toiling away in the bubble gum mines in our brightly colored fancy rubber shoes.

Bathing Apes, the wackest shoes ever?

Posted in Hate with tags , , , , , , on November 28, 2008 by circuitspec

Granted, I’m no fashionista by any means, but I know wack when I see it. I’ve been chomping at the bit to break down my analysys of the super-wack Bathing Ape shoe. These idiodic kicks have plagued my eyes for too long. Here is wikipedia’s intro to these shoes…

QUOTE –

A Bathing Ape (or BAPE) is a Japanese clothing company founded by Tomoaki “Nigo” Nagao in 1993.[1] The company specializes in street wear, operating stores in Japan, including BAPE, BAPE Store, Foot Soldier and the Bape Exclusive store (located in Aoyama, Tokyo). The company also operates Bape Cuts hair salon, Bape Café and gallery, Bape Sounds records. There are also stores located in Hong Kong, London, New York, Taipei and Los Angeles. Nigo also founded the women’s clothing lines “APEE”, and “BAPY”, the female “couture” clothing line.

Nigo, founder and owner, cites his mother and father, who were a nurse and a billboard maker respectively, as major influences in the development of his character. Though because they both worked, he spent a lot of time alone with toys.[2] He also credits DJ/Head Porter designer Hiroshi Fujiwara as his business model.[3] His nickname literally means “number two” in Japanese; the MD of Astoarobot, the fashion store, coined the moniker when he noted the physical resemblance to Fujiwara.[4] Nigo cites his early influences as Elvis, The Beatles and hip-hop acts such as Run DMC and Woobens.[2]

After studying fashion editing at college, he worked as an editor and a stylist for Popeye magazine.[3] After borrowing four million yen from an acquaintance, who also let him use his shop,[2] he opened “Nowhere”, his first store, on April 1, 1993 in Harajuku, Tokyo. Deciding to start his own brand, he named it after the 1968 film Planet of the Apes. According to Nigo, the name “A Bathing Ape” is short for a Japanese saying “bathing in lukewarm water”. Japanese people typically have daily baths in water at temperatures above 40 degrees celsius (104°F). As such, bathing in luke warm water is to complacently over indulge. This is, ironically, a reference to the lazy oppulence of the younger generation of Japanese, the brand’s own customers.[2] To expose the brand he gave T-shirts to Cornelius who wore them when performing. For two years he produced 30 to 50 shirts a week, selling half and giving half to friends. In 1997, Nigo released his debut album ‘Ape Sounds’ under Mo’Wax, with DJ/Producer James Lavelle of UNKLE. [4] In January 2005, Nigo and Pharrell launched the first “Bathing Ape” store in New York. The official name, according to the salespeople at the store, is “Bathing Ape in Lukewarm Water.”[5] Nigo is also co-owner and head designer of Williams’ Billionaire Boys Club.[6] In 2006, Nigo and N-Kei Enzaki started a record company, Ape Sounds, with help from James Lavelle, a UK DJ and owner of the Mo’ Wax label. He serves as a producer and director for his CDs, blending Western hip-hop with Asian sounds.[3] Lavelle wore a BAPE t-shirt on the cover his mix album Global Underground 023: Barcelona.

-END QUOTE-

Although appealing to pop-culture, dumb blacks and non-black people trying to express some form of culture or cling to a fading youth, bathing apes are atrocious. “But Mike, WTF does a Bape aka Bathing Ape, aka Bape Star look like. Below, I’ll point out to you a Bape shoe, and common traits, so even YOU my apprentice haters, can view and hate in public as you see them.

untitled

I don’t give a shit if these are supposed to be some sort of tribute to Jamaican colors. There’s a reason why Jamaica isn’t a world superpower. It’s shoes like these, that help support that reason.  There’s only one person who can pull off Jamaican colors..

Moving on, these shoes are also notorious for the usage of outlandish materials. Sometimes Ostrich, sometimes Snakeskin. They’re notorious for their use of shiny plastic.

snake-bape

Yes, I’m quite aware of many high end designer labels that use skins on their shoes. Hell, I even that shits baller. Not on these though, when I think of snake skin, or ostrich skin on my kicks only one thing comes to mind…

shitkickers1

It’s seriously, the image that shoes like these create that make me not take people seriously. I’m sorry, if you rock these you can’t be taken seriously.

omfglolz

This image here, can have me start a WHOLE other blog in itself, trust me, the hate will be activated. So, you’ve seen the shoes, now what about the wearer of these shoes?

You might find these douche bags, rocking a pair…

The Champion of all Narcissistic fucks, Kanye West. BTW, nice shades douche, and you wonder why you got into a car accident that nearly ended your life.

kanyewest

Soulja Boy…wackness confirmed

Lil’Wayne – wackness confirmed

Pharell Williams…I hope that ‘chain’ was made with blood diamonds.